Author Archives: Dorothy Dalton

Brevity: The secret to a good interview

Throughout history, people way wiser than myself have counselled on the value of brevity.

“Good things, when short, are twice as good”. ~ Baltasar Gracián
“The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.” ~Thomas Jefferson
“….to talk well and eloquently was a very great art, but that an equally great one was to know the right moment to stop.” ~Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

My A level Economics teacher Mr. Thomas, used to exhort our class to be “concise, precise and relevant” which reduces to a helpful acronym of C.P.R. Excellent advice which I can struggle with and have to be mindful of at times. It is indeed a skill and talent which if not innate, can be developed, importantly not to be confused with being monosyllabic or taciturn.

There is one place where the ability to be brief adds value. That’s in the interview process.

Brevity: the secret to a good interview

1. Brevity shows you understand that an interview is about creating a dialogue

And is not a monologue – especially in response to that old chestnut “tell me about yourself” – which is indeed a loaded question.

2. Brevity shows you know your stuff: your USP and Personal Brand

Who you are and where and how you add value! When you are concise, precise and relevant, you are able to highlight your strengths and success stories succinctly, inviting interviewers to pick up on the points that interest them the most. This could be important for you to sell certain parts of your experience and skills a little harder, or perhaps even to re-group if you need to.

3. Brevity shows that you are an active listener

The adage that we have two ears and one mouth and they should be used proportionately, comes into play here. If you are talking – you are not listening. This means that you could be missing key body language cues: drifting eye contact, fidgeting hands and so on, all signs that you are losing your audience. This strategy can include:

Reflecting before responding: clarifying or paraphrasing the question if necessary to establish exactly what is required of you.
The two minute rule: generally this is the right amount of time for one person to be holding forth without a break, unless you are making a presentation.
Elaboration: Ask if your response has answered their question adequately and if they would like you to develop any point. That puts you firmly into the game and takes you out of a passive role.

5. Brevity allows you to conquer nerves

Many of us talk too much when we are nervous (I do!) but learn that this is what you do and set up some coping strategies and relaxation techniques to get you through the first difficult moments when nerves overtake you.

6. Brevity facilitates strategy

If you are concise, you can target your responses accordingly and feed in the information that you want to showcase strategically.

7. Brevity allows the interview to become a two way street

Many people overlook the fact that the candidate is also assessing the company, the position as well as the interviewing manager. If you have created time to listen by being succinct, you can observe communication styles, the surroundings, as well as interaction between the people involved in the process. Very often these can give telling signals about cultural fit.

George Burns said “The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.”

It can also be the secret to a good interview!

What stories do you have about talking too much?

C.P.R. is part of my career coaching programme. Get in touch now.

A case for the “alpha bitch”

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Suzannah works in investment banking. She is on track for a senior role and intends to have a high 6 figure salary (at least) by the time she is 40. Her goal is to break through the glass ceiling in this male dominated sector which has less than 10% women at board level.

Sacrifice culture

A 70 hour week is her norm and leaving the office at 9.00 p.m. would be considered an early finish. Her boss might ask her only semi-jokingly if she has enough work. She is well-groomed and exercises regularly. She has time for passion, but not romance. Her biological clock is ticking and she knows that. Although she thinks about having children, her partner is a corporate lawyer, she is not sure marriage is in her long-term vision. The only items in her refrigerator are nail polish and left over takeaway. She has a housekeeper and has no idea how her own washing machine works.

As a top revenue generator she improves the team results. She believes that there is one passenger in that number and she has made her thoughts clear. Her colleagues respect her, but don’t seek her out socially. She travels internationally at the drop of a hat to make pitches and close deals, and always sits “at the front of the bus.” With a reputation as a tough but fair negotiator, she takes no prisoners when she closes deals. She knows she is considered in the office to be difficult to work with, and at times referred to as a “a complete bitch.”

Does this bother her? Not one bit. She told me why.

Gender blow back

“The difference between the alpha female and the alpha male is that most men and women admire the alpha male and most men want to be like him. He is considered to be successful. When I do exactly the same thing, the alpha female becomes the “alpha-bitch” in the eyes of both men and women, and almost an object for sympathy and ridicule. Being tough, direct, successful and assertive is not considered to be feminine and attractive. My approach doesn’t fit a mould and neither men or women know how to deal with that.

I work hard and give 100% plus. I don’t expect my subordinates or peers to work the way I do, or have the same ambitions, but I do expect them to do a proper job. I’m a result orientated rather than presence insisting manager, and if someone works long hours and needs to attend their child’s school play at 3.00 p.m. then I’m OK with that … if they get their work done by the deadline.

Women are as guilty of perpetuating stereotypes as men

Gender Stereotyping

Sure we should fix the system, but if I wait, I will be dead! I am not suggesting there aren’t other ways to do business, but I get tired of waiting for men to create better conditions for women. They are not getting it done. I get even more irritated by implications that I’m a “ball-breaker” because I don’t behave in a stereotypical female way. Most men by definition aren’t aren’t alpha males either, but alpha males don’t get the type of flak that I do.

My starting salary in my current organisation was twice that of the other women at my level because they had failed to negotiate their market value and were being under paid. This is not my fault. At least one has now had a 30% increase because of my efforts. Should I decide to have a child, then I have negotiated more generous maternity options than are on offer currently, which will certainly become a precedent for the other female employees above a certain level in my firm. Just as all men are not dominant and assertive, not all women are group-hug, collaborative and supportive. Most times someone has to take tough decisions.

Work is not a popularity contest which is what worries many women and holds them back.

They are just as guilty of perpetuating gender stereotypes as men and they need to get over it.”

Strong words…What do you think?

If your organisations needs support dealing with gender bias – get in touch NOW.

Please mind the CV gap

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Have prolonged recessions and a global pandemic softened hiring managers’ attitude to periods of unemployment and a CV gap? Perhaps not…

History repeating itself

In December 2008, I was walking through an eerily deserted Canary Wharf in London. It should have been one of the busiest shopping weeks of the year, but the full impact of the banking crisis was being felt so the shops were empty with up to 75% price cuts in many. The worst fears of the financial pundits were yet to materialise as many in non-related sectors were sucked in to one of the biggest economic downturns for 80 years, generating a massive global domino effect on employment.

12 years later I walked through Brussels airport which was equally deserted as they world was gripped in a global pandemic.

In between we had any number of mini recessions and layoffs causing periods of unemployment.

Has anything changed?

In between times we have come to learn about unemployment bias. LinkedIn invented the green “Open to Work” circle which has generated acres of commentary. But has the scale of these calamities changed the views of hiring managers to the plight of candidates who have been unemployed for a period? Anything over 9 months is considered long-term unemployment.

I talked to a group of people who have shared their perceptions down the line as they handled the issue of a CV gap.

Michael – Arts graduate June 2009, U.K.

“Instead of a feeling of achievement and elation the whole class was anxious. All through our final year we had seen the economy tank and prospects looked grim. Only one of our class mates had a job and that was with his father’s advertising agency. I did 3 unpaid internships in a row in galleries and agencies supported by my parents. I finally got a job in a start-up but the conditions were border-line exploitive and the manager was a bully. I’m now working in a fast food restaurant as an Assistant Manager and although I’m acquiring great skills (I manage a team of 8 and deal with all the HR issues)

I still get comments that it’s not a “proper job” when I go for interviews in my field and struggle to account for my “career” choices. Portfolio careers seem to be more talked about in the press than in the real world! So although I’m not unemployed – I may well have been. I don’t think there is that much sympathy. Work ethic doesn’t seem to count for much”.

Béatrice – Recruitment Manager, France

“I was delighted to get pregnant with my second child born in August 2021. When I returned from maternity leave in 2022 there had been a hiring freeze because of the pandemic and a forecasted recession. The department cut by half and completely re-organised. My old job had been re-distributed, with the only role remaining a junior administrative job.

I accepted a redundancy offer and am unemployed. Explaining that period is very difficult in interviews even now, especially when it follows maternity leave. People in jobs forget really quickly that unemployment is around 8% in France and is still a huge problem.

Having to explain a CV gap is challenging”

Do you need help explaining a CV gap? Check out the individual coaching programmes.

Ricardo – ex Marketing Director, Italy

“I had a successful career in marketing and brand management in the fmcg sector. In 2019 I was head hunted to lead a team in an SME company supplying the hospitality industry which gave me a place on the management committee. I started in June 2019, but by April 2020 the marketing budget was slashed to zero as the order pipeline dried up and I was made redundant.

Initially I tapped into my network and was able to go for interviews, but although I was shortlisted I was never selected. The feedback was that it was related to salary and that I was too expensive and over qualified. I tried down grading both my salary and CV – that didn’t work either. I slipped into depression and struggled to find the motivation to face the world. In three years the only work I have done is small consulting projects. I am divorced and wanted to stay in Italy to be near my children but am now internationally mobile. I seriously worry that I may never work in the corporate world again.”

My own observation is that “copy-paste” hiring is still generally the preferred selection process for many companies. In a supply led market the harsh reality is that most hiring managers have a huge choice of candidates and easier access to them. Although it’s important how candidates present how they used that time effectively.

But the reality is recruiters and hiring managers need to manage their biases.

What advice would you give?

Need career transition advice – get in touch NOW

Note: updated 2014, 2023

Career success and tattoos

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Sam Cam’s dolphin tattoo

I’m not a personal fan of body art, partly because I’m afraid of needles and even fainted when I had my ears pierced. My son has a number of mystical messages tattooed on various parts of his body. The only advice he listened to was that none of them should visible when dressed professionally. What can look cool on a toned, youthful, wild – child body, can also look less appealing as age and gravity kick in.

You may aspire to be something arty and Bohemian at 18, but what happens if 10 years later your rock ‘n roll ideas fade and you decide to become a Chartered Accountant? Or a future U.K. Prime Minister.

: Nigel Farage 1983

So without going into aesthetics and into debates such as women with “tramp stamps” being allowed in the Royal Enclosure at Ascot, when I was recently asked the question whether body art can impact career success, I had to be mindful of my own biases.

So I would say, it will very much depend on some or all of the following factors:

The particular body art – the size, the position, the message, the visibility. Even the U.K. Prime Minister’s wife Sam Cameron has a small ankle tattoo, so some discreet tattoo on a part of the body unlikely to be on display in a normal business environment is clearly not going to be a problem. My son’s answer to my own vocal doubts was “Mum, my boss isn’t going to see me without my shirt on.” Well, that’s a relief then!

The targeted organisation: some organisations will be very tolerant and accepting of tattoos and piercings – fashion, music, media, sport for example are sectors where tattoos abound, but others will not. If you had a crazy, youthful moment and have now settled on a more traditional path, then this could be a problem if the result of that moment is highly visible and can’t be covered.

Marcus told me “ I have a half sleeve tattoo which I had done as a student. It’s not visible when I’m wearing a business shirt. At a recent company golf outing when I was wearing a short sleeve polo shirt, the lower part could be seen on my upper arm. I could feel the disapproval of the senior, older partners. Nothing was said directly at the time, but my manager told me I am lucky I am a good golfer, the implication being that if I wasn’t I wouldn’t be invited back. I feel annoyed because it has nothing to do with my performance in my job. But next time I’ll wear a long sleeve shirt”

Some organisations, particularly public service bodies ask for photos of any body art as the part of the application process particularly if the use of communal changing rooms is part of the work routine. I have also been involved in processes where facial piercings have been held against candidates, both with and without jewellery in the holes.

The type of position applied for: body art can be problematic in any client facing role. HMV made headlines recently by introducing an appearance code requesting employees to cover up extreme body art. As the competition for jobs becomes more intense in the recession, many are opting for painful removal of their tattoos by laser surgery, at possibly a higher cost than having the original . One Spanish clinic is reporting an upturn in tattoo removal business as employment opportunities contract “Getting rid of a 4in sq tattoo will cost about €200 (£167); a larger one will set you back €1,500, and the more colours involved, the longer and more costly the treatment.” Learn from Belgian Kimberly Vlaeminck who now deeply regrets the 56 star constellation she had tattooed on her face which are still visible after laser surgery.

So overall message, think hard before going down the permanent body art path. If you change your mind it could be painful and expensive, and not just to your career.

Is couple’s career coaching the new way forward?

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I recently had a call asking me if I did couples coaching and family planning. I told the gentlemen he had the wrong number. The phone rang again. It was the same chap. No he insisted. Are you the Dorothy Dalton who does career transition coaching and wrote Children: A Corporate inconvenience and The Great Divide: Planned Parenthood and Corporate Planning?

Why ..? I asked somewhat cautiously.

“Because I would like some professional input on how to create a strategy for my career, knowing that my partner and I intend to have children and want to be involved with our families, but we are both ambitious professionally. Neither of us want the pressure of being the sole income earner. What advice would you give? Is it possible do you think to have a couple’s career strategy?”

This was actually a first for me!

Background

Nathan is just 30. He has have been with his partner Holly (28), for 8 years and they are intending to marry in 2015. They both have successful early career track records in their chosen fields – Law and Consulting. Although neither consider themselves to be high-fliers, both aim for senior management positions by their early 40s. Holly stated early on that she is not a “bra burner”!

Both are well paid and it was clear that salary is important to them both, in terms of status and the opportunities a high dual income can offer. They have a comfortable life style but generally work 50+ hours per week. They are hoping to buy a flat in desirable post code in Central London, without parental help, Nathan was quick to point out. Both would like private education for their kids and second home ownership, somewhere warm, is part of a mid-term dream. Neither want to be the sole main wage earners or child carer. With the cost of raising a child to 18 rising almost annually, they anticipated they would need two healthy salaries throughout their working lives to meet their goals.

Here we have the archetypal career couple challenge, but with a modern approach of joint forward planning, rather than leaving anything to chance. Previous generations simply suggested that women strive “to have it all” and we know how well that worked don’t we?

Is this the new way forward for today’s young couples?

I suggested they could factor in the following:

Ongoing strategy: It’s impossible to start a joint career strategy in 2012 and just leave it to take care of itself. It has to be an ongoing part of their joint long term goal setting process. Sheryl Sandberg said that choice of partner is one of the most significant decisions we make in a lifetime. Yet 50% of modern marriages end in divorce. I suggested that Nathan and Holly make a conscious decision to invest and check regularly that they remain on the same page and continue to share the same goals. There can be a tendency for all of us, especially when busy or stressed to simply drift.
Audit of current companies. Can their existing organisations offer what they are looking for or should they move for optimal longer term career progression in line with their goals? What are their parental leave policies for example? Holly’s manager had been told when she announced her pregnancy that having a baby was not one of her KPIs and was already starting to be side-lined. Holly believed she would need to move sooner rather than later to build up her career and reputation in a new organisation.
Target future companies. Look for organisations with strong and supportive parenting policies as well as an active commitment to a balanced work/life culture, which both could optimise, without being penalised. This would be especially important to Nathan. The reality is many companies discourage men from taking paternity leave in practise. Networking in these organisations to establish if these policies are really implemented, rather than lip-service clauses in the company handbook, would be helpful.
Senior women: Target companies with women already at a senior level, who have a reputation for being supportive of junior women. Holly does not want to be a trail blazer.
Where to live: Is the proposed property purchase a transition purchase or should they be looking at addresses near to preferred schools, with perhaps accommodation for a nanny and with easy access for family support?
Fertility back-up plan: I have known many couples make a plan to start a family, but nature doesn’t always oblige. Just because they intend to have their children when they are 36-42, doesn’t mean to say it will happen. This age range is associated with reduced fertility. Oocyte cryopreservation (egg freezing) and elective sperm freezing would be worth researching.
Financial planning : Seek professional financial advice early on. Create financial reserves.
Plan for the unexpected. Although it’s great to have a joint life and career strategy, all laid out and agreed and I do think this type of consultation will become increasingly common, sometimes s?*t just happens. It’s not on the plan and we can’t do anything about it. People get sick, accidents happen and the unexpected hits us sideways. The skills to cope with these off-plan challenges will be paramount and not using them could mean that they become like under utilized muscles, without exercise they are not effective when called on.
Drop the plan if it stops working. The plan is not the end in itself and panic is not the best fall back position. Give advance permission to create contingency plans!

What advice would you give to couples to create a joint career strategy? Is this the new way forward for today’s young couples?

If you want to make a joint career strategy as a couple – get in touch.

Being present isn’t the same as being visible!

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Being present doesn’t mean you are not invisible

A recent article in the Economist “Working from home: out of sight out of mind,” highlighted the negative impact that a flexible work place culture can have on some individual employee’s promotion prospects, if they are home-based. But the piece also prompted a wider debate, as a number of people went to great lengths to share with me!

Nothing new

Marianne commented “This concept of “invisibility” within organisations has been with us for some time. It isn’t just associated with the development of new technology! An employee can be forgotten even when surrounded by co-workers. Any number of corporate situations can cause employees to become invisible”

Alone in a crowd: employees in large organisations tell me that despite belonging to a massive global workforce, where their bosses walk past them every day and they are surrounded by co-workers, they can feel as isolated as if they worked on their own. This can be related to personality type, leadership style, the function being carried out and quality of co-worker relationships. Laura says “I work in a small team involved in technical regulatory affairs. We are only 5 in total, but all have separate offices and work on different, discrete projects. Because of the management style of the head of unit, we could all go for days without direct inter-action! Even though I am the most junior I have started to organise lunches and meetings, in case I would go mad!”
Non glory functions: most organisations have sexy or high-profile glory functions which can be sales, events or innovation, depending on the nature of the business. Back-office functions while critical to business operations, have low visibility in many organisations. “Imagine working in compliance for an international logistics company! ” Paul told me ” I have to make a real effort to meet colleagues outside my own department as well as my co-workers in other locations, otherwise I would sink into oblivion. I also run the company cycling team which helps cut across functional barriers! This is where the backroom nerd can be as visible as the most successful rainmaker”
An overseas assignment – is for many an opportunity of a lifetime, not just a career. It is important to take into account early on, the role offered and how this function relates to the core business activity of the organisation. Peter, a Sales Director for a global pharmaceutical company was offered a regional general management position in Dubai. Although he and his family loved living in U.A.E., he was very mindful of a need to stay connected to key personnel in the company HQ to make sure he was not relegated to the role of regional expert. He was offered and accepted a second tour, but turned down a third 3 year stint. “Running a regional team was great experience, but I was very aware, despite my best efforts, that I was becoming “Our man in Dubai” which was taking me out of mainstream business management. I became too valuable for my local knowledge and was falling off the central radar. Eventually I had to leave the company to stop being sidelined in U.A.E.”
Regional roles – many companies like hi-po executives to do a stint at grass-roots level at a production unit or regional office. But sometimes a posting in another town can create the same distance psychologically, as an assignment in another country. Lisa told me “I had a great chance to run a business unit. It gave P & L responsibility, manufacturing experience as well as heading up a technical team. But at the same time I had to fight pretty hard to be invited to the sales conferences and for inclusion in some other key meetings“

All commentators mentioned the importance of an ongoing need to raise or maintain visibility within their own departments, functions and organisations, with both bosses and colleagues equally, to avoid a drift into oblivion. There is also a need to sustain a connection to the centres of power and decision-making, wherever they might be, to stay on the corporate career progression radar.

Being present isn’t the same as being visible, or even being heard! None of these are necessarily related to new technology or changing workplace practises!

B.A.S.I.C: A Networking strategy for Women

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Create a simple networking strategy

I was invited recently to a corporate sponsored (this is important) golf outing as a guest for the social only, clearly being expected to play to my strengths! My short game is somewhat longer than it should be.

As I waited at the bar in the club house for my host, I observed the players coming off the course and circulating. Here are two almost verbatim accounts of conversations between 2 pairs of golfers I overheard at the 19th hole:

Ladies

Maria : Hi I’m Maria J. Pleased to meet you. Are you a member here?
Jane: Jane P. Yes I’ve been a member for 10 years Which club do you belong to?
Maria: Sunny Golf Club, I joined in 2000
Jane: That’s a nice course too. I did look at it when I first started playing, but the traffic is really bad on the A123, especially on a Friday. Where are you driving from?
Maria: Well, I work on Business Street, Brussels but live in Very Nice Suburb. On the weekends – it’s only 20 minutes by car.
Jane: Very Nice Suburb? That’s a great area. But quite far from Business Street.
Maria: I know – the kids go to X School and we wanted to be close to there. Even now I feel as if I spend my entire life in the car! Do you have kids? (in response to nod) Where do they go to school?
Jane : They’re only in the local primary school – but I still spend too much time in traffic!

(Conversation continued about best school runs, school curricula, summer programmes …)

If you want to become an effective networker check out the coaching programmes and training options

Gentlemen

Tom: Tom X. Pleased to meet you
Joe– Joe Y… likewise. How did you get on today? Great course –I haven’t played here for years
Tom –     10 over. More bogies than birdies as they say. You?
Joe – played to my handicap
Tom :     what are you at?
Joe:      22 and you?
Tom : 16, just dropped last year. Where do you play?
Joe :   Sunny Golf Club –been a member for 10 years
Tom: Good course. Played there with Peter X of Better Products last summer. He smashed that 9th hole, the one with the dog-leg to the green. Do you know him?
Joe: That’s true the 9th is tough–I know Pete X well – we should play together sometime. Let’s set something up maybe in October? We have a roll-up competition ( Pulls card out of wallet)

(Conversation continued about business and golf courses, people they had in common and game set up)

I recounted this story to lunch buddy Silvana Delatte who challenged me to create an acronym to help women network.

This is what I came up with B.A.S.I.C.

#B = Wear your business hat first at a professional and corporate event. Be strategic and inquisitive professionally. Identify some business basics and have networking goals! It’s OK!
#A = Assess the situation. Ask Socratic questions (who, what where, why and how?) to find out more about the person. Ask for card and contact details. Give yours. Avoid Mumspeak and private over sharing too early in this conversation. At a school parents’ evening it would be different. This can actually upset women without children, as much as diluting a woman’s professional presence.
#S = Synergy what and who do you have in common? Be strategic! Suggest connecting on an online platform. You are then connected not just to them but also able to tap into their networks.
#I = show interest and interact professionally as well as personally. Implement your strategy.
#C = Now is the time to Chat and Create relationships. People do business with individuals they like and trust. This is where women excel, social beings that we are.

Research by Monica Stallings of The Wharton School, suggests that both men and women show a preference for multi-plex networking, that is, they network with people they like and trust. But it’s men’s willingness to be more instrumental and strategic, that puts them ahead of the networking game. We all wear many hats in our daily lives. We wouldn’t wear a fascinator to the office or a business suit to the gym. Leaving our parenting hat in the cupboard at a corporate event is no different, until it’s an appropriate time to share.

Neither Jane or Maria had brought cards to the event. Jane’s company shortly afterwards announced major cuts in the workforce. Maria is the HR Director of a company in a loosely related sector. Would being aware of each other’s professional identities have made a difference? They’ll never know!

What acronym can you create to prompt women (and men) to become more effective networkers?

Get out of the job search advice maze

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: Navigating the job search maze

Create your own Job Search Advisory Board

If you Google “job search tips” there are 460 million entries. Now I haven’t looked further than the first 3 pages, but I can imagine they contain some widely differing nuggets of advice. Add to this, the well intended input from friends, family, colleagues and bosses, it’s hardly surprising that the average job seeker is scratching his/her head in bewilderment.

Confusion
Only last week I heard that one client had been advised from someone in Germany not to create his own web site when he was actively looking for corporate opportunities, as well as freelance consulting work. Another was told to dumb her resume down by a university friend, so not unsurprisingly was getting cut after either the first screening or interview. Another was advised not to connect with people he didn’t know personally on LinkedIn by a colleague nearing retirement. Another was advised by a neighbour that a certain professional networking event wasn’t worth it!

So what can you do when there are so many different opinions and how does the average job seeker navigate his/her way through this veritable maze of job search advice? The answer is with considerable difficulty.

Get on Board
One way to get over this problem is to strategically create your own advisory board to give you varied, but focused access to a range of opinions.

But how do you go about this and who should you include?

Set job search goals and create a strategy: for most jobs seekers this key first step alone gives necessary focus. It cuts out the scatter gun approach of “asking around” and sending your CV to a group that is simply too wide.
Research – your sector and chose companies thoroughly. Target them.
Create a strategic network – identify a number of individuals who can mentor you and answer your questions. Choose different age ranges, locations, backgrounds and personality types to create your very personal Job Search Advisory Board. As the CEO of your own brand you can synthesise the results and take your own decisions Who do you need?
- An up to date source – A group of connections with more opinions than experience of job search will not be helpful. You need someone who has been in the job search market or associated with it in some way during the last 3-5 years, otherwise the chances are they are out of date. The market is changing at a rapid pace and it is very hard to keep up with, even for those who work in the sector.
- Age range – people tend to network and seek advice in their own age demographic. Some are strongly bound to the way their age group does (or has done things) things. Get a cross-section of input.
- Cultural differences – there can be marked differences between corporate, sector, professional, regional and national cultures. Someone seeking a job in the construction sector in Germany, will have and need a very different approach to an U.S. based Marketing Manager. Once again get a cross-section advice.
- Personality types – We all have different styles. If you are an introvert, the approach of your extroverted advisor may fill you with horror and bring you out in a cold sweat, but there could still be some lessons to learn. Likewise the extrovert could profit from some lower key approaches of a more reflective personality.

Whatever you do:

Monitor your results – if you are not getting any results at all, something needs to change even if it means going out of your comfort zone. We can all get stuck and caught up in rigid thinking. Experiment. Create a web site, put professional details on Facebook, connect with someone you don’t know personally, attend networking events you were told may not be useful.
Trust your gut – if something doesn’t feel right it probably isn’t, at least for you. Go back to step 1! Find what is right for you and don’t be afraid to change.
If all else fails seek professional help.

How do you filter job search advice?

Gen Y – how you stock your fridge can be important to your career!

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How you stock your fridge is a valuable behavioural interview question!

In the absence of her manager, I was recently asked to sit in on some graduate entry-level interviews to support and mentor, Tanya, a new addition to the Talent Management team of an international company. As we mapped out the structure of our individual roles, Tanya’s proposed line of questioning took me by surprise!

Who stocks the fridge?

While I was assigned to cover the traditional HR areas, transferable skills, communication ability, future goals, leadership potential and so on, Tanya’s line of questioning came from a totally different angle. She intended to throw into the interview pot questions on where/how candidates bought their groceries, where they lived and what they ate and cooked.

I must have looked faintly mystified. How you stock your fridge is important because…? She clarified: “Some entry-level candidates are babied by their parents. They order their kids groceries for them on-line with home delivery. They set up accounts in takeaways, shops and restaurants with the bills being sent to Mum and Dad. They arrange for cleaners or even come to clean their kids houses/rooms themselves. Some candidates wouldn’t recognise an egg in its shell, let alone know how to cook one. They live off junk food. Some mothers freeze and label a month’s worth of dinners and put them their kid’s freezers! One candidate told me how he had been told off by a delivery man for paying a £2.50 delivery charge on a £2.00 item, rather than go out in the rain. The more wealthy parents buy their children houses and apartments, so they can live in a nice area. Even parents who are not well off get into debt.”

Exceptions

Aged 28, Tanya is a relatively recent graduate herself and as she gently reminded me, more in touch with what really goes on with her generation. Her own recent student experiences gives her an insight into the way some candidates have lived during their student days. She was quick to add: “Clearly not all are like that so it’s important to sort them out. This is just another way of identifying which ones are independent and can stand on their own 2 feet, or which ones are still firmly bound to their parents. We need candidates who are self – sufficient practically and psychologically. It’s a skill to be able to balance all your domestic chores with your professional commitments and we don’t want candidates who can’t cope”

Helicopter parents

I am of course very familiar with helicopter parents in the recruitment process, so it shouldn’t have come as a surprise that if parents are involved in these procedures then they are also pro-active in their lives as students. But it did! All students are delighted to have the odd cake or pie from home (I was!) but their weekly groceries? I think I would have thought I had died and gone to heaven!

So although parents think they are supporting their offspring, this is just another way of depriving them of learning valuable life skills (budgeting, time management, prioritising, healthy living, becoming a judicious consumer to name only a few) which can impact their careers if they are not in place. As the interviews unfolded a surprising number did come unstuck. How you stock your fridge turned out to be a valuable behavioural interview question.

I think I learned as much from Tanya as she did from me.

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What’s in a name? More than you think!

10 Replies

I found myself sitting in a group recently and the conversation turned to the challenge of names! It transpired that all present had some issue with their names and much to my surprise over 50% of the individuals around the table had changed theirs legally. This is much more common than I ever imagined with 58000 people in the U.K. changing their names in 2011 alone and not limited to celebs such as John Wayne and model Elle Macpherson wanting to lose their less glamorous monikers!

In my group the reasons given were:

Marriage – assuming new husband’s name. I was quite surprised that the young women in the group had either changed their names to assume their husband’s name or intended to do so.
Divorce – dumping the ex – husband’s name. I was equally surprised by the women who hadn’t changed their names post divorce, even in the most acrimonious circumstances. Others had reverted to their maiden names (which is their father’s name quite often). Declaring your marital/ relationship status is no longer necessary in most countries but it might be advisable to check your employee handbook to establish what the requirements are for your company for communicating this transition.
Merging names: Many couples are double barrelling names after marriage as a compromise.
Never liked assigned name – the majority of changes were because they simply never liked their names and wanted something completely different, a name of their own choice which they felt was more in line with their own personalities. Not just their first names, but family name as well! I actually only connected with my own name relatively recently! Here, there will be legal guidelines to follow and informing any necessary contacts. Make sure that you have a document (Joe Brown formerly known as Peter Jones for example) to support this change. It will be especially necessary for academic certificates and references from previous employers, credit checks, bank accounts etc. Apparently leaving the office on Friday as Melanie Dobson and returning on Monday as Zoë Maitland was relatively seamless, producing only minimal difficulties. One woman reported testing a number of different names with friends and colleagues before finally selecting her first choice!
Name difficult to pronounce – my son tired of people misspelling and mispronouncing his Welsh surname and anglicised it.
Discrimination – sadly, some people in the conversation had changed their names to fit into the culture of the country they had chosen to live in. They felt particularly in job search this had increased their chances of being called for interview.
Name too common: One group member had tired of being one of the millions of John Smith’s globally and never being able to claim a domain name or unique email address! He just wanted to stand out!
First and last names : One woman had no problem with her names but commented that her boss introduced all the men on the team by their first and last names, but her only by her first. Should she be put out? Yes possibly! She isn’t Beyoncé. It just seems more professional and perhaps this more familiar, slightly indulgent approach suggests a more service role (maids, waitresses are frequently referred to by their first names only.) Definitely ask why there is a different approach based on gender.

So, how do you feel about your name?