Author Archives: Dorothy Dalton

Ladies get your heads above the parapet!

What are you doing to become visible?

One of the strongest comments made about the average professional woman is their reluctance to step up, engage and make themselves visible. Ladies get your heads above the parapet!

The creativity required to dream up the excuses I hear from these ladies alone, suggests their inner capabilities. They are first class. Women are long-term relationship builders so this is an area in which they should excel, but yet they still hold back. This of course means that there are a reduced number of visible female role models to emulate at all levels, not just at the top.

According to a recent corporate study by Mercer, only 5% of respondents indicated that they provide a “robust programme” to develop female leaders. So although there is much talk about what governments and organisations can do for us women, there is so much more that we can do for ourselves. We cannot hang around waiting for other people to take care of us!

On-line

All women should create one or more on-line, comprehensive, professional profiles. And then engage. This sends out a message that you take your careers and professional activity seriously. They must include a professional biz photo. Many women are not keen on this for any number of reasons, but mainly I have found it is related to confidence issues and insecurities regarding their appearance as well as concerns about wide internet exposure. As a lady of a certain age I can empathise with both concerns.

But women understand the power of appearance and should use that to their advantage, even if it means an extra trip to the hairdressers, perhaps more makeup than usual and a good photographer. This is head and shoulders only. If it was a bikini shot I’d be with you!

Professional platforms

OK, firstly professional platforms are not dating or “adult ” friendship sites, or super model contests and although I do know one woman who has received any number of marriage proposals, I think that is the exception rather than the rule. It also depends on the way women individually conduct themselves and of course, there are many filtering possibilities for any unwanted, inappropriate behaviour.

Today, women have to network with people they may not know personally. This of course could expose them to that general vulnerability that the internet facilitates, in the way that walking down a street can expose any women, anywhere, to any number of weirdos. It is always possible to block or report the offending person.

For those who are really concerned I would suggest starting in an environment in which you feel comfortable, perhaps a women’s group and build on from that. Create a separate email account specifically for networking if it’s a clogged inbox that is a concern. I drank two (large) glasses of wine before I pushed the publish button on my first blog post, so it’s something I can relate to.

Making time

Women often say they have no time to network or take on anything extra. Getting out there and participating whether on-line or IRL ( In Real Life) is vital. The reluctance of women to network strategically puts them at a significant disadvantage.

Don’t forget there is no such thing as time management – it’s you management and about the allocation of priorities. Give yourself priority. Strategically select the networks which will be most useful to you and be active. Engaging online is also something that can be fitted in with other responsibilities, so is a perfect instrument for women and is entirely self scheduling.

Waiting for the perfect moment

There can be a tendency with women to get caught up in the “getting it right” rather than ” getting it done”, even in very low risk situations. This is a good moment to ask that time-honoured question ” What is the worst thing that could happen?” The realistic worst case scenario is usually far removed from the anticipated catastrophe.

Self advocate

Women very frequently wait for recognition. We wait to be invited, endorsed and promoted. This is the time to find your personal power and exercise it. Self promote and give yourself the award. Some inner work examining skills and challenges will help build up that much-needed confidence, so that elevator soundbites can be delivered with the words “I successfully + verb…”, ” My strengths are..” If you struggle with this, please find a mentor or a coach to support you. And yes, you have incredible skills and talents, but if you don’t know what they are how do you expect anyone else to?

Change your gift list

This brings me neatly to this point. Women seem reluctant to invest in personal professional development. This was eloquently developed by Anne Perschel of Germane Consulting in her post ” Ditch the Glass Slippers and Power up the Ruby Reds..” Women make up the world’s greatest emerging market and although we will spend money on any number of luxuries, we tend to invest less in our careers and professions which seems incredibly short-sighted. Who else is going to do that? Brian Tracey suggests that we spend 3% of our income on personal development.

It was a gender neutral statement. So ask your friends/ family/Significant Other to dump Dior, or bin the Michael Boublé Compilation CD for Christmas, Valentine’s or your birthday, to give you a subscription to a professional journal, a business book, an appointment with a professional photographer or a workshop. Better still, treat yourself!

Become a mentor

Women of any age and position in their professional life, even entry-level can mentor other women. Be active in connecting and endorsing women who can support each other, or have some other mutually beneficial relationship. Until women step up in the way that men do, we will always be one step behind. We have to pay it forward.

So what are you doing to become visible, today?

If you are looking to get visible get in touch NOW!

The season of discontent: Singles speak out

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The holiday period can be a season of discontent for some

I have spent time over the years large numbers of younger high-powered professionals. What they all had in common was that they were either single, or if they were in relationships, they had no children. Young and fancy free – sounds fun right? Well ..no! This was not the season of goodwill but the season of discontent.

Workplace flexibility

Chat moved on to their plans for Christmas. There was more than a little disgruntlement about the issue of how their offices would be staffed during the holiday season. Some companies now close completely, but others expect a level of skeleton manning. There seemed to be an unwritten expectation in all their organisations (cross sector) that when it came to allocating holidays there was a pecking order: employees with children would be given (or take) priority and then the singletons, would be expected to volunteer to organise cover amongst themselves.

These people were not happy! Not just because they wanted to go skiing or the Maldives (although a few did) but because they had their own obligations and commitments which they considered to be equally important. In recent research I carried out on the priorities of Gen Y women for 3Plus International, I saw that they were somewhat intolerant of workplace flexibility for women only and advocated flexibility for all.

Other obligations

David, a Consultant with a major audit company fumed “My parents are divorced and I need to make two family visits. It’s just not possible to do that in a few days. All I want to do is take my vacation time when I want it. Last year I provided weekend cover and worked late in December, so that the parents could go to school concerts and do Christmas things with their kids. Parents assume they are entitled to take the time off between Christmas and New Year. I will be expected to work. It’s not that I begrudge them flexi-time – but I think it should be offered to all”

There are also many different types of care and domestic or family responsibilities. Susan is single in her early 50s and has strong obligations to look after her widowed mother, now in her mid 80s. Peter’s wife has recently been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease and requires additional support. They claim , that the fact that an individual has no children doesn’t mean their commitments are necessarily any less demanding. In a C.C.H. survey carried out in 2007 in relation to unscheduled absenteeism, more than 60% of unscheduled absence is related to non sickness reasons, resulting in huge costs to companies.

Responsibility to and for self

But what about the employee who has no responsibilities for others, but simply wants workplace flexibility to allow them to look after themselves? As working days and commutes become longer, technology now offers many options to facilitate that. Workplace stress also causes significant organisational and health issues, so shouldn’t employees be encouraged to give their own needs priority?

Madeleine was more direct and took a firmer view. “People with kids feel that their family status puts them into a special category. Having children is a lifestyle choice. Couples know what the issues are when they make the decision to have a family. My boss quite often asks me to cover for her when she has to leave early or work remotely to deal with childcare issues ( she has 4 kids) .I’m totally OK with that, but when I wanted to go to the gym in office hours, because fitness is a high priority for me and after a 12 hour day, I’m too tired, it was suggested that I go at lunchtime. Lunchtime is for eating!

Fun!

The irony might be that working Mums, the group which cries out for work place flexibility the hardest, would actually benefit if that perk became standard for all. Leanne Chase of Career Life Connection takes the matter one step further and suggests that with regard to workplace flexibility

“ for it to be universal we need to place a whole lot less emphasis on “family” “women” “care-giving” and “children.”

Could it be the protests from the singletons who want to look after themselves, or simply take time off at the holidays to relax and have fun, with no obligations at all, which will make a difference? The holiday period for many is a period of joy and giving. But for others it morphs into a season of discontent .

COVID update

Despite the change in situation and an increasing number of people working from home the message seems to have stayed the same. There is still an expectation that those without children will provide cover and even more so when the schools were closed during lock down. The flex for all mantra seems to have gained even greater momentum. The season of discontent seems to be a year long issue.

What do you think?

If you want support with managing your career – get in touch NOW!

A plea! Keep job profiles real!

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Why do we get job profiles so wrong?

Lost in translation

As both an executive search professional and a career coach, I am frequently bemused how hiring managers and job seekers fail to communicate with each other and misunderstand or even misrepresent themselves in the process. I’m very mindful there is a strong sales role involved, with both parties wanting to present themselves in a positive light in CVs and job profiles, but sometimes things are taken too far. The end result is ill feeling, frustration and lost time for everyone involved in the process. Nowhere is this clearer than in the preparation of, and response to, job profiles.

Over qualification

For the hiring manager the seniority and level of a team can be an in-house status symbol. This is why on some occasions the academic requirements demanded for some positions and included on job profiles, would ordinarily be sufficient to split the atom or find a cure for cancer or HIV. MBAs are not essential for all openings! If we are absolutely honest, a number of jobs don’t even require a degree, let alone any post grad qualifications. Provided that literacy, numeracy and social skills are in place as well as any relevant professional experience, the university of life would be just fine. Heaven forbid if the Receptionist should look for a financial instrument in a tool box.

Misnomers

We also have zany, inaccurate or simply incomprehensible job titles, which switch from time to time because they are closely linked to trending buzz words. Some of these are meant to be fun or to give lower level jobs some clout, but they can be misleading. Gallerista (art sales) Head of People or People Officer, (sounds like something from the Red Army), Nail Technician (carpenter or beautician?), Strategic Focus Specialist ( I thought strategy was focused) Head of Culture, Bakist (cake maker?) Certified Scrum Master (rugby team coach?) Managing Co-Ordinator (seems to be a misnomer – do they co-ordinate or manage?) or any bizarre combinations of technician, engineer, specialist, consultant, executive or other words with the ” ist” suffix.

Experience

The same can be said for years and type of experience required. Sometimes I see profiles asking for experience levels which when totalled, would cumulatively take even entry-level candidates to retirement age. Or demanding experience in certain technologies which have only been around for less than the time period required (10 years in social media, some softwares) The reverse also applies, I see ads for experienced interns! Isn’t the whole point of an internship – to gain experience?

Old jokes

There are also all the old recruitment jokes about hiring speak:

fast paced environment = no time to train you.
ability to handle heavy workload = You whine, you’re fired.
some overtime required = some time tonight and in fact, some time every night
flexible compensation package = sometimes we pay you, sometimes we don’t
high level of travel = family life will become a distant memory

Candidates need to get it right too

But the converse can be said for candidates. I posted an ad earlier in the year which clearly stated “fluency in German essential.” After being inundated with applications from all corners of the world where the candidates clearly didn’t know a brockwurst from a bratwurst I had to add “fluency in German mandatory. I will be unable to respond to candidates not meeting this requirement” which did seem a bit rude. Or there was the “social media genius” with 10 LinkedIn connections and 5 tweets to his name, applying for a position as a Social Media Consultant. This is one reason that so many CVs drift into cyber space – they are not on target!

So why don’t we all make life easier for ourselves and just tell it how it really is!

What do you think? Add any crazy things you’ve seen! A prize for the most obscure or off beat!

If you need help with your job profiles get in touch

Dealing with a loaded question

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That loaded question “Tell me about yourself”

Job seeking advice is a bit like parenting or relationship advice. Most people have done it and everyone has an opinion. No, or even disastrous experience, in any of the above, still leaves some undeterred. Share they will. Of course, basic common sense and a certain objective distance can go a long way, but a little knowledge can be a dangerous thing.

Old chestnut

In the job seeking process, an old chestnut which prompts massive debate and conflicting advice is the loaded question “Tell me about yourself.” I probably screen, coach and interview in excess of 80 people a month, so do have some experience. Imagine my consternation when a coaching client working on her interview presentation to that very question came up with “I’m a passionate, charismatic, happy person, enthusiastic, hardworking and witty. And I don’t like cheese.” An eyebrow was raised. Mine.

The source of this inspiration came from an internet blog post by an advertising exec, recently turned transition specialist. I dreaded that the prepared response to “Why should we offer you the job” would be ” Just do it! ”

Before my inbox fills up, I’m not writing-off humorous introductions out of hand. I am the champion of flexibility as you know. There are indeed times when a witty one – liner or gimmicky presentation can be really effective, but you have to know when that might be. For most this is not easy if you have only clapped eyes on the interviewer for the first time, 2 minutes beforehand and might be nervous. It’s high risk and can backfire. Instead of piquing interest, it may just waste valuable time. For this particular client it was possibly career kamikaze.

Iron fist in velvet glove

To avoid misunderstanding, let’s get a major point nailed. “Tell me about yourself” is a loaded question. It is a hard-hitting opportunity to gain insight into a candidate, masquerading as a sweet, gentle icebreaker. It is an iron fist in a velvet glove, so preparation for any candidate for this is vital. Although this is not articulated, what they want to know is what you have done in the past and whether you can do it in the job you’re interviewing for. To think otherwise will lull you into a false sense of security.

Language choice

So although it’s important not to give a career chronology and I’m not a fan of elevator speeches either (prefer elevator sound bites), providing a list of qualities only, can also take you into dangerous territory. They tend to be what I call “non words“. Enthusiastic, hardworking, happy and loyal should be a given and are wasting either space or time. Would any organisations look for candidates who weren’t any of the above? No they wouldn’t, so you have to ask yourself how do those qualities translate into added value. Actually, add cheese to that list too or any other dietary preferences. It is really necessary to dig deeper and ask more penetrating questions.

Does it mean they are positive thinkers which could make them problem solvers and solution finders? Does it make them calm under pressure and capable change managers? What further value do those qualities add? Does it mean the person can be relied on to produce results on time and possibly be a good team member and/or an effective leader?

Adapt to your situation

The qualities requirements of any job vary, so it’s important to tailor any response to the specific profile and also to the audience. You can’t use the same stock phrase in every situation. There might indeed eventually be some people who will share an antipathy for cheese, but for the most part I would doubt it. That requires a certain level of empathy, an understanding of the position and mental agility to alter your approach and vocabulary content as appropriate.

Double edged

Remember as well that the many qualities we all have, carry a downside. I very often see people describe themselves as “detail orientated or perfectionist.” But associated with those characteristics are some negatives. Perfectionists are sometimes slow implementers risk averse and procrastinators, because they get too caught up in getting things right, rather than getting things done. Big picture thinkers are sometimes poor implementers. Passionate can suggest loose cannon or lack of focus. That’s another reason why it’s better to dig deeper and indicate the value of these traits, rather than just listing them. There are also many well established personality tests available that also give precise feedback if anyone struggles with self insight.

Beware of bragging

There is a fine line between selling yourself and appearing arrogant. Saying you are “charismatic” is like saying you’re good looking. Those characteristics are normally self-evident the minute a person walks into a room. There is no need to verbalise it! They are also subjective. One person’s charisma, is another person’s turn off. Wit is also very personal. Translate those into added value. Individuals with strong personal appeal tend to make excellent sales people, leaders and public speakers. Show how that quality has worked for you. If you are a “brilliant salesperson” then you will be able to provide metrics to back that up and can drop the superlative.

I know it’s really hard to know who to listen to and which bits of advice to filter out. But eventually there is no substitute for knowing yourself. Any candidate who has been through that process will be flexible and confident and know what to deliver, when and how.

The best person to trust is you.

If you need help with interview preparation get in touch NOW!

Superwoman: an out moded concept

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Mushrooms, breasts and dentists

Yes there’s a link to why superwoman an outmoded concept is still being regurgitated in the 21st century !

Like many professional women in the 80s, I got caught up in the Shirley Conran philosophy that smart women could indeed succeed in a career, cope with motherhood and still have time to do throw a dinner party together, while of course, looking gorgeous 24/7. Moving on from Betty Frieden who asked the disillusioned middle class American housewife in the ’60s ” Is this all? “, Conran’s best-selling book Superwoman published in 1975, possibly turned out to be as misleading to women as any anti-feminist tome.

Having it all

Her mantra of “life is too short to stuff a mushroom ” became the catchphrase for women of the era. We were thrilled to have approval to pursue our careers and were finally given permission to take short cuts on domestic activities. Women no longer had to choose between career and a family – we just had to manage them.

There were two core concepts which were only lightly queried:

the first was that real work and the greater sources of satisfaction for women, lay outside the home. This of course created an instant rift with the stay at home mothers and genuine domestic goddesses who felt devalued.
The second was that it accepted domestic responsibility and child care as primarily a woman’s role. So this turned out not to be so much “having it all” as “doing it all“, a notion which lingered to our detriment. It perpetuated the myth that the way forward was by increasing our household efficiency not sharing it with our partners.

So women either did all the work themselves, or if they could afford help, they masterminded domestic operations with military precision. Lives became complex balancing acts and a juggling of priorities with those ever decreasing commodities – time and energy, topped off with a good dose of guilt and angst, so eloquently described by Marion Chapsal in her post “What is masculinity?” Any role played by many of our partners was described as “helping”.

Background

I spent the summer with a large number of young women aged 23 – 30. I found some trending topics had changed, but surprisingly much hadn’t. Our conversations were both reassuringly and depressingly familiar. Today, 60% of graduates are women and they make up over 50% of the workforce. I expected natural changes associated with that demographic shift.

Are their choices any clearer?

The answer is not really. Although equal pay is now officially in place, there are still gender disparities in income levels. Women are still absent from senior roles and all research shows that they are still responsible for a higher percentage of household chores, although happily that gap is closing over the generations.

Similar pressures

These women lamented the lack of senior women role models within their organisations , just as we did. Surprisingly, they were unsympathetic to women with children being afforded special treatment in the workplace (flexible hours, remote working, priority at holiday periods, reduced demands for overtime, travel and weekend working) and felt this flexibility should be available to all. They even felt that single, childless people were expected to compensate for what they perceived to be lifestyle choices of co-workers with families.

They are appalled by the decisions made by senior managers in the hierarchy (male, older, work centric) who they believe sacrifice family life for high salaries. They want to own property, choose furniture and have children. They talk about wedding cakes. They are still under pressure to look good, plagued by conflicting messages, both direct and subliminal of becoming a size zero, but with Barbie breasts and hair.

They are very aware that slim, attractive women earn more than those who are not. Many of their parents are divorced and they want financial security and independence.

So do they still want it all?

Research

I decided to ask! Research from a very basic mini survey I sent out suggests:

74% of respondents indicated that professional success was “significant but not to the exclusion of other goals“
42.3% of respondents indicated that having children and raising a family was “significant but not to the exclusion of other goals”
57.5% of respondents indicated that a future partner would be fully involved in childcare

Having it all – but not doing it all

So it seems that these women do want to have both professional satisfaction and success and to combine it with raising a family – just as we did. They want to be financially independent even within a couple and expect their partners to be fully engaged in household management and child care – those are two key variants.

It would seem that they do indeed want to have it all, but with a major difference. They don’t want to do it all. This is a huge generational shift and eminently sensible. Research indicates that both Gen Y men and women are either more family or dual centric than their parent’s generation and their partners will be willing to be more highly engaged.

Ironically, part of women negotiating and achieving greater success in the workplace could be closely tied to the balance they strike within their own homes and relationships. This suggests that the father’s professional role will no longer be considered more important than the mother’s within the family unit. It also needs men become more family centric so they too will make demands on the system for change? I think it will.

As Conran also quipped, possibly older, wiser and more exhausted, 29 years later in 2004 “you don’t need a pair of breasts to take a child to the dentist”

Perhaps they will even have time to stuff a mushroom or two. Do you?

One thing is for sure why we are hanging onto the notion of superwoman, an outdated concept if there ever was. It needs to be kicked back to the 80s where it was created.

If you need support managing your career – get in touch NOW!

Duvet Day….zzzzz! Benefit or Ruse?

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Does a duvet day in bed increase employee engagement?

There are a number of week days a year when truthfully, I don’t feel like getting my not so little bottom out of my bed. It’s not that I’ve had a wild party the night before, but it might be cold, raining, snowing or the day just looks as though it might be better viewed from a horizontal position.

Regrettably, I can only put the alarm on snooze for 15 minutes max and I just have to get up and get on with it. I have clients, candidates and calls and I’m not sure how many of them would react if I just said

“Soooo sorry not in the mood today. No reason – I’ll get back to you tomorrow”

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I suspect I would go out of business quicker than you could say bankrupt! Or would I?

Duvet Day

Yet, we have a phenomenon which seems to be around in some organisations called a Duvet Day. www.duvetday.org define this practise as follows ” a term that has become synonymous with the act of taking a day off work or school when you ‘just don’t feel up to it’. You are not ill, you don’t want to lie to the boss; you just need a day in bed!! “ One of the upsides is seemingly reducing carbon emissions by cutting back on fossil fuels used up during a commute! Good wheeze!

How did this creep into organisational culture? It seems that it originated with US corporations, seeking to become enlightened employers and to foster employee loyalty. Early adopters in the UK include PR company Text100, in 1995. An allocation of several duvet days per employee is now becoming more widespread, reports suggest, as is the wider concept of helping employees maintain work/life balance.

Unscheduled absences

Unscheduled staff absence due to illness or other reasons can be very costly for employers, official statistics and survey data reveal. In the UK it was reported by the Health and Safety Commission that 36 million days of work were lost due to sickness absence in 2006 and 2007, and the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD) estimated the annual cost of sickness absence to UK employers to be £659 per employee. Previous studies found that employers significantly underestimate the costs to their organizations of unplanned absenteeism.

In the United States, research in 2007 by Mercer National Survey of Employer-Sponsored Health Plans, found that the equivalent of around 9% of total salary costs were incurred due to unplanned absence although that does vary considerably between different types of organizations and is higher in the public sector. The CCH Inc. 2000 Unscheduled Absence Survey indicated that sickness absence accounts for only around 40% of all unscheduled absenteeism, with family factors also being significant. In the UK, a study by the Sainsbury Centre for Mental Health puts the total cost to UK employers of absence due to stress and mental health problems at £8.4 billion. Overall patterns of sickness absence are quite similar between different countries, being higher among women, than men and among older, rather than younger employees. .

Workplace informality

At the same time we have seen the general growth of US-inspired workplace informality; dress down Fridays ( where men are excused from ties and suits and women can wear jeans). In some organisations these are morphing into dress down every day. The dress codes of work places is becoming more casual, as employers recognise the connection between employees feeling comfortable while at work and the quality of their results.

Life style management services

Another growth area is so-called homing, where because of longer working hours and commutes, the office is made more like home with personal PA and concierge services (dry cleaning, car washing, laundry, groceries delivered to desks and general errand running) taking on the functions that many people need, but don’t have time to do themselves, so are happy to outsource.

Workplace flexibility: perk or placebo

So is this drive to give us more flexibility a superficial ruse to lull us into believing that things are better than they are and we don’t mind working all those long hours or as hard as we do? Is it all a con? Mike Emmott, employee-relations adviser at the CIPD, in a report, Flexible working: good business; How small firms are doing it, demonstrates the value – the economic benefits as well as less tangible measures – of flexible working, noting the common elements. “The managers were all “people” people; they were good at communication and fostered a caring ethos in their businesses. This meant they had low absenteeism, very high retention of expertise and experience, and workers who looked after each other.”

Emmott was particularly struck by how policies promoting work-life balance were “so intimately linked with business ideas about profitability. It’s about resolving business issues, not just about being lovey-dovey”.

I don’t know about you – but I’m going to take a nap!

How divorce impacts executive search strategies

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Does the traditional nuclear family facilitate our talent management strategies?

One of the areas that anyone involved in the hiring process is not allowed to explore is the marital / relationship status of any potential candidates. I am completely supportive of this, but with the caveat that it is impossible to separate a significant part of someone’s life and assume it doesn’t exist. It does, and in most cases, any difficulties will usually surface somewhere in the career transition process. Life issues do eventually become workplace issues.

Rise in divorce rates

I have noticed recently how the rise in divorce rates is impacting executive search. Last week alone, a significant number of potential candidates expressly cited divorce as a reason for not engaging in the search process.

Life events

This information is based on candidates willingly and voluntarily sharing very private and sensitive information with a total stranger. There are possibly others who just have just cited location, travel requirements, timing and all the other reasons candidates give for not being interested in a position. I have no idea if they are the real reasons. Given that (depending on the stats you read) roughly 50% of marriages end in divorce, it’s perhaps possible that divorce underlies many candidates reluctance to engage.

Changing jobs is also one of life’s major challenges, especially to a new company, in possibly a new location. Having these two major life events occurring simultaneously is too much for many. Even if the opportunity is a perfect fit, they have to turn it down.

Psychological impact

As anyone who has been through the process will tell you, the effects of divorce can change virtually every aspect of a person’s life including where they live and with whom , their standard of living, their emotional well-being, their financial situation and liabilities and time spent with children. For many their social group will change and perhaps the needs of new partners and their children will also have to be factored in, as modern family life becomes ever more complex. Almost all would describe it as a challenging and stressful time.

Take a look at these trusted executive search and research solutions!

Time issues

The divorce process saps enormous amounts of both time and energy. It involves meetings with possibly lawyers, counsellors or therapists, real estate agents and financial advisors. Stress can lead to health issues requiring medical treatment. James, an ideal candidate for one particular search told me ” There is no way I could focus on changing jobs right now. I am struggling to keep all my balls in the air currently as it is. I have been depressed. Looking for somewhere new to live, dealing with lawyers and seeing my children at weekends, as well as my job, is all I can cope with at the moment. My manager is cutting me a lot of slack”

Childcare

For one or both parties it will mean moving house, itself a life challenge. Child care arrangements will need to be set up as more and more children (50%) split their time between two households. This places a greater reliance for any professional person on local support networks, which might include grandparents, day care or help at home, if it can be afforded. Quite often the current employer has been sympathetic which fosters additional and strong employee loyalty. Sometimes those same flexible arrangements cannot be replicated with a new company, especially at the start of a new job.

Joint custody
I talked to Annick in France whose employer had agreed to her travelling only during the weeks her ex husband was responsible for the care of their two children. This time was fixed by the court and was not flexible. But additionally, professional input suggests that fixed routines for children under these circumstances are best for their well-being and have to be strictly observed. Annick felt that her hands were tied at least for the next 10 years, until the children (ages 6 and 8 ) became more independent. Her future career she believed would now be limited to local opportunities with limited travel.

Remote working

Many potential candidates in these circumstances ask about remote working. Most companies are reluctant to afford that facility to new employees at the beginning of their careers with their organisation, except possibly those in the sales force. There will usually be a certain period of onboarding, where it’s important for the new employee to be physically located with the people he or she is working with or managing.

Re-locating

Relocating as part of a family unit has its own stresses (I’ve done it), but relocating as a single person, or even a single parent, is not straightforward. Pieter in Holland, in his early 50s with 2 adult children told me ” I’ve just gone through a divorce and chosen a house to be within easy distance of my kids. It has taken me time to rebuild my life and a social network. I just don’t want to start over in a new place. I am happy to travel so if the company would agree to some element of home office working – I could be open”

Travel

Saskia, is a senior executive I contacted for a position based outside her native country, with a reasonably high level of travel. With the ink barely dry on her divorce papers she felt that she may not even be allowed to take her children out of the country on a permanent basis by her ex husband or the courts. With the high level of travel, she would have to hire support to cover any extended absence in addition to daycare. She didn’t want to do that, not just for financial reasons, but she simply didn’t want to put her children in on what would be at times 24 hour care, in a foreign country. In her current job and location their grandparents stepped in to fill the gap.

Trend

This significant trend is already having an impact on workplace dynamics. In the talent management sector we have become reliant on the existence of the traditional nuclear family, as a way of facilitating the movement of talent and supporting career transition. But it seems that is changing, so we have to find ways to adjust our strategies to make sure we are not losing the best talent because of circumstances which now a high percentage of the population are experiencing .

So what do we need to do to adapt to those changes? Ideas anyone?

If your organisation needs support with creating a talent management strategy – get in touch.

Trapped! Women and the smiling myth

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Or why does no one write books about men not smiling enough?

A few weeks ago I wrote a post “10 ways women supposedly sabotage their careers“. It sparked some heated discussion. The 10 ways were lifted somewhat unceremoniously by Citibank’s Diversity Department, from the book Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office by Lois Frankel (sales of 27 million) and converted into dubious “bumper sticker” phrases to support women in the organisation (+/- 330.000 employees globally).

One seemed to attract more attention and curiosity than the others – women seemingly sabotage their careers by smiling inappropriately. This I thought merited closer inspection, because that’s a helluva lot of women believing they smile at the wrong time in the workplace. But what constitutes inappropriate? Where does this smiling myth originate?

Some basics

A spontaneous smile is defined as “a facial expression formed by flexing those muscles most notably near both ends of the mouth. The smile can also be found around the eyes ..” known as the Duchenne Smile. A smile is deep within our primate nature. It depicts positive social relationships and confirms anthropologically that no harm is intended. Combined with eye contact a smile is perceived to be the sign of a confident person, but most importantly, it suggests energy and vibrancy to the recipient. How can that be damaging?

Some research

According to Daniel McNeill, author of The Face: A Natural History, women are genetically built to smile in order to bond with infants. “Smiling is innate and appears in infants almost from birth….The first smiles appear two to twelve hours after birth and seem void of content. Infants simply issue them, and they help parents bond.”

Although women apparently smile more than men, this statistic changes when other variables are factored in: culture, ethnicity, age, or when people think they are being observed, according to the study funded by the National Science Foundation.

“It would be interesting for social psychologists and anthropologists to look at these data because the wide cultural, ethnic and other differences suggest that the sex difference is not something that is hard-wired,” said Marianne LaFrance, professor of psychology at Yale and senior author of the study published the journal psychological Bulletin. ” This is not a function of being male or female. Each culture overlays men and women with rules about appropriate behavior for men and women”

Minimal differences

The cultural variables were also interesting, with women in the United States and Canada smiling more than in other parts of the world, (England and Australia) African-American men and women smile equally, while there is indeed a gender difference amongst American Caucasians. They also noted that when occupying similar work, power and social roles, the gender differences in the rate of smiling disappears or is minimal. Here, LaFrance surmises that the sex differences are overridden by smile norms for the position one is in, rather than by gender.

Perceptions

As they rise up the career ladder, the rate at which women smile therefore is line with their male counterparts. This is why Hillary Clinton, Angela Merkel and any other senior professional woman would conduct themselves correctly! The converse then should presumably apply and men working in service roles should be motivated to crank up their own smile levels a notch or two. Speaking from personal experience, I would suggest some French waiters or male railway personnel (Platform 5, East Croydon to London Victoria) might be a good target market for any future books on the appropriateness of the male smile.

Assigned roles

Research also shows that the facial expressions of men when stressed become fearful and angry, while the incidence with women is less. So in male dominated stressful business environments are we just conditioned to expect this type of reaction from our leaders than anything else? Do we simply expect our leaders to look fierce? Perhaps this is the reason why according to Management Today trust in CEOS increases when a woman is in charge in difficult times.

Imprecise vocabulary

What sort of situations would therefore merit accusations of smiling inappropriately, or is it simply poor word choice? Delivering bad or sensitive news with a wide grin perhaps? Smiling when anxious, more accurately called grimacing. A sarcastic smile – known as a smirk? As women are recognised as having superior qualities of empathy, then the same research would suggest that they are actually less likely to react inappropriately. LaFrance says women are more likely to smile to defuse tension doing what she calls “emotion work” – but as creativity tends to go out of the window when tension exists why is this negative?

Trap 1 of the smiling myth
Perhaps the smiling quotient (and herein lies the first trap) is related to the fact that women have traditionally carried out service functions and men have been assigned ” warrior” roles. Their smiles are therefore perceived (no matter what they are achieving) as being an indication of deference , and therefore self sabotaging, in leadership roles. This myth is now even being perpetuated by women themselves.
Trap 2 of the smiling myth
What is even more worrying that countless women now believe that in order to succeed they must modify a key and instinctive part of their behaviour to conform to male norms over and above what they do naturally as their careers progress up the male hierarchy. That will lead to that age-old fall back of course, the second gender trap: accusations of PMS in the corner office.

If there is to be any levelling out of smiling ratios, the next slew of books should perhaps focus on men smiling more.

Struggling with gender bias in your career – get in touch NOW

Living in the shadow of your own resume

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Are you what it says on the tin?

Or do you live in the shadow of your own resume?

I received a CV from a candidate (let’s call him John). My eyes lit up.

A complex search had just become much easier. His CV was powerful, positive, succinct. But unhappily John was not. His responses ranged from arrogant and overbearing to hesitant, unclear and evasive. If his resume had not been on my screen I would have had no idea what John did.

Who was this person?

Many candidates suffer from what I call Resume Shadow Syndrome. This is when a CV is stronger than the candidate’s personal presentation of themselves, whether in person or on the phone. They therefore live in the shadow of their own resume. This means that they will be called for interviews or contacted by telephone, but will either come unravelled at the first screening stage, or the face to face interview.

Their CVs are highly branded and compelling. They are a white label. Similar but different and not in a good way. Overall feeling of feeling disappointed and cheated.

Basically for different reasons, they don’t own their message.

No quick fixes

They believe that having a strong CV is the magic carpet solution to career change, where they can float over the whole process, preferably at speed. This is a career myth which needs debunking. In fact constructing a strong resume is probably only the 3rd or even 4th step in a building block process to success and by leap frogging all the basics they crash and burn.

It’s like thinking you can tackle black ski runs because you have bought top class equipment and look good. Not happening. Or finding out from the small print that the “top quality fresh ” product is full of dubious additives and unpronounceable, 10 syllable chemicals.

A client said to me “B -players can write or have someone write for an A-player resume. It makes life tougher.”

Why is this so important?

Having a powerful CV is only part of the job search process and although it will open doors, it won’t get you the job! It’s only part of communicating your message (brand) so that people hear you! If you are not connected to your own message and you are not what it says on the tin, then you’re in trouble.

What can go wrong?

• No self insight. The CV has been prepared with professional help but with insufficient time on core “discovery” work and follow-up. You have to do basic discovery work and spend some time reflecting on your achievements and skills. If candidates don’t really know themselves, how can they expect other people, who don’t know them at all, glean any understanding of them.

• Poor delivery. The message might look good on paper but it has not been converted into a compelling verbal narrative. Not enough practise! Laziness, ignorance or arrogance – or a combination of all three

• Poor first impression. Body language, general appearance and demeanour are incorrect or inappropriate.

• Insufficient preparation. No research is carried out on the companies and individuals involved in the process. Most companies make it easy for you to learn about them on their website and LinkedIn. Remember Google? Even if it’s not an interview, but just a networking session or an informal chat, make sure that you know who will be involved in the process and practise your elevator speech.

• Inferior content. Be concise, precise and relevant in your delivery with crisp presentation to avoid detailed questioning, because your point is fuzzy. See point on preparation, research and practise. Understanding your core mission statement and practising the delivery of your message , over and over again if necessary, is key here. Don’t expect it to be alright on the day. Even confident people get nervous and forget things. Be direct and professional in terms of language and topics covered. Interviewers don’t want to know about your kids sports games – unless you are asked.

• Fuzzy. Be honest and don’t exaggerate or evade. Skilled interviewers can detect spin or lies instantly and will pick at it until the truth is out. You want to avoid the ” Let’s go back to…” unless it’s a major achievement and even then you should have sold that thoroughly. Fuzziness creates doubts. If there are real doubts – you will be cut.

• Negativity. Be positive – don’t run your ex company or colleagues down. It’s a small world and you never know who knows whom. If you do that about one company you could well do it for the hiring manager and organisation.

Anyone who thinks because they have one strong document they can short-circuit running the hard yards can be in for a serious wake up call. You have to be who you say you are on the tin!

Just make sure you are your own brand and not a white label!

Need help creating a compelling career narrative, get in touch NOW!

Additional discretionary duties as required

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Can you be too flexible?

Are additional discretionary duties a normal part of a job description?

A contact of mine has recently started a new job. Everything went smoothly, the whole search process completed in record time, a contract was presented and signed, a draft job description included in the on boarding programme, a corporate manual and workplace ethics booklet 2cm thick, were all courriered over in advance of the start date. So far, so super. No detail was left uncovered.

However, several days after he had arrived, he was asked to sign his job description and in the small print he noticed for the first time the phrase ” for operational reasons the job holder may be asked to undertake additional discretionary duties as required ”

Was he being foolish he asked me? How flexible could he be expected to be? Could he end up mopping floors or cleaning bathrooms?

As with many things the answer is that depends!

Company size

Earlier in my career I joined a start-up. My official title was Administration Manager which covered a multitude of sins. My primary function was HR and recruitment for the fledgling organisation, but if a delivery had to be made and it was on my way home, I did it. The MD vacuumed the carpet if a customer was coming in. No one said it’s not my job, because the organisation was too small for anyone to be precious. If they did the business would have folded. One day the Sales Director was hospitalised unexpectedly for a month. I was the only person available who could fill the gap, even though at that point I barely spoke French. That month changed the direction of my whole career. I loved it, was successful and I never went back to straight HR.

Is that scenario likely to take place in a Fortune 500 company? Will P & G ask employees who are not hired in the delivery function, to sling a few boxes of Pantene or Dash into the back of their cars and whip them to Carrefour or Tesco before close of business. I think not.

Would an accountant in GE be deployed to operate a production line? Equally unlikely.

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Reasonable requests

However, it would not be unreasonable expect an employee to participate in projects or support other functions with specific personal expertise. Businesses cannot be run with rigidly defined job descriptions where everyone acts like robots. In knowledge based jobs employees don’t even want that. Flexibility can offer opportunity for personal growth as well as satisfying business needs and should certainly be considered and embraced. If the job morphs into something for which a candidate was not recruited and is not acceptable, then this obviously has to be taken through the appropriate channels. I have known job functions change so significantly that candidates have decided to leave either at the end of the on boarding process, or shortly after. It can be as a result of genuinely unforseen economic imperatives and organisational shift, or sadly a result of poor hiring processes, where there should be no shocks at all.

Entry level

It also depends on the level of the position in question. Entry level personnel quite often complain that they are asked to carry out what they perceive to be menial tasks, not found in their job descriptions. Photocopying, making coffee, answering the phone. That’s something they need to get over, in the short-term at least.

Gender stereotyping

Women are frequently expected to take on extra responsibilities because of an unspoken gender stereotype association: making / serving coffee, organising birthday gifts and parties for staff, attending after work drinks events with a senior manager. That is something they should definitely not get over and very politely decline. Even as interns they should try to make sure that these duties are shared equally with their male co-workers.

Extra miles

Some organisations pull the “flexibility” card and walking the “extra-mile” to the point where contractual or even statutory obligations are ignored and exploitation kicks in. This reflects mismanagement or even organisational chaos, which is clearly very different. Resentment builds up and job satisfaction and performance levels are severely reduced.

These situations are not dictated by specific responses to exceptional circumstances or even related only to the type of duties required, but to hours worked, team numbers, travel levels, geographic location and other changes to previously agreed contractual arrangements. I spoke to a young City lawyer who told me that in her firm :

” Lunch is for wimps. Needing to eat is seen as a sign of weakness.”

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Marcus recounted how he had been asked to fulfill many of the duties as departmental manager, without any official recompense. Peter said in his company anyone leaving the office on time is perceived as a “slacker”. In all cases normal negotiation strategies should kick in. If they are rejected, then depending on the job market, 2 words come to mind: voting and feet.

So although the phrase ” additional discretionary duties to meet operational requirements” is unlikely to be synonymous with floor or bathroom cleaning ( unless you are hired as a cleaner) it definitely merits clarification and amplification with the hiring manager. Flexibility is an equal opportunity employer for both development and exploitation.

So no, definitely not a silly question.

If your organisation needs help with writing job descriptions – get in touch NOW